I just feel like blogging.

My heart is beating in trepidation even as I'm writing these down. The future never seems so near. It's like another 3 months so and I'm done. One chapter of my life closed and another starting- starting in the marketplace, in what all adults called the real world. I mean, planning about it, dreaming about it, it's totally different. I am very nervous on what's to come. And, there's God, there's cellgroup, there's Iggy.....A whole lifetime I cannot imagine, I cannot fathom. Such great dreams and visions, you know. And yet the sense of, "It's coming. No longer just a dream. It's for real."

I was pretty passive and whatnot. Now that a greater part of the long-time members, that has been with me ever since I stepped into church 3 years ago, have been transferred out, I really feel like there's no more to it. No more excuses, no more procrastination that someone else can and will do it. There's greater and real responsibilities on me, and with actual lives in my hands. Day by day, I'm growing more in love, more inspired, more motivated to do things for God. And no longer for myself. Perhaps why life is made much more difficult for me is because I cannot, in Chinese saying: One leg step two bed (in direct translation, ha ha) Okay my Chinese suck. But anyway, ya, I can't. I've pushed God away too many times. Did it my way for too long. No more!
My priority, my focus: My God. I'm gonna start over.

Labels: determine, God